Frequently Asked Questions:

Q.   Where did you get the idea for 'Any Horrible Occasion' cards?

A.   I have had the rumblings for a card line celebrating awfulness going around in my brain for several years. In fact, I had a whole file of 'awful' sayings and events that I wanted to use.

Q.   So what took you so long?

A.   I couldn't find an artist that had the look and feel that I wanted. I worked with several people but it was just the 'same old – same old' and I wanted something that would reach out and grab people by the jugular.

Q.   How did you settle on the old masters?

A.   This is why I get to hold the title of 'creative genius'! After yet one more disappointment with an artist I was looking at a print of American Gothic by Grant Wood. I figured that if I put a tornado behind the house and had flames coming out the windows that it would make a jolly good logo. It did – but it didn't. Poor Grant hasn't been dead long enough for me to get the rights to use his painting without paying through the wazoo, so I transferred the idea to the Mona Lisa instead. (Now I only have to pay through the wa.)

Q.   So that started you into the classical art genre?

A.   It was all downhill from that point. As I started doing research I found hysterical paintings and sculptures, many of which, I am sure, were considered funny even at the time they were done. Other pieces were serious in their own right but I have a demented sense of humor that could twist them into funny cards.

Q.   How in the world did you find out all those intimate details about the artist and artwork that you've included on the backs of the cards?

A.   Duh! As if I actually know what Archimboldo ate for dinner in the 1500's. If you look closely you will find a disclaimer that gives me complete literary license to make up tons of funny stuff. If I had only listed the underlined 'true' stuff the backs would be BORING! But now they are as humorous as the front or the inside.

Q.   I have heard that this line is autobiographical. Is that true?

A.   Absolutely! I have lived through every single one of the 'Horrible Occasions' (with the exception of the boob job). I have been divorced…twice…, sued, audited, hormonal, pregnant, old, ticketed, and had whole years that read like a soap opera.

Q.   Your answering machine says you had a car stolen, a flood and put a cat down. Is that really true?

A.   Within 2 days of getting our phone system up, yes, it all happened.

Q.   So do you really laugh when bad stuff happens?

A.   I was at my sister's house with several of my kids when a neighbor called to say that my house had just been hit by lightning. That was a new one. We looked at each other and burst into gales of laughter, then piled into cars to go check out the damage. I mean… really… lightning?

Q.   Are there subjects you won't touch?

A.   Yes. True tragedies, like the death of a child, sexual or physical abuse or physical or mental handicaps are trials that should be dealt with in a much more respectful manner. But anything to do with 'stuff', money, bad luck or relationships I feel is fair game.

Q.   Do you ever worry that you will run out of ideas?

A.   All the time, but so far it has not happened. If it does I will change my title to the 'Dried Up Creative Genius'.